Wanderlust

Gratitude and the end of Wanderlust

July 27, 2007 at 6:14 pm elinordye 8 comments

Dearest wanderlustians,

The time has finally come – the next time I post, I will be back (briefly) in San Francisco, three and a half months and more than 4,500 miles after I left. I thought about riding around in circles so I could hit 5,000, but then that seemed silly. To give you some perspective on how long ago I left, remember the Virginia Tech massacre? I left the day after that happened. That was a long time ago, folks.

There is a lot I want to process and reflect on, threads of ideas that I will pull together into some sort of coherent picture of what I’ve learned and done on this trip. That can be done at any time, though, and what I want to do before the trip ends is say thank you. Although for the vast majority of this trip I’ve been by myself, I have hardly been alone. I am inestimably grateful to all the people – all of you – who have helped me through this amazing adventure.

Thank you to everyone who has been reading about my trip, commenting, and sending encouragement. To Carol and Robert, for inspiring the idea of wanderlusting across the country and your unflagging support, love, and encouragement. To Elizabeth, for being literally the best co-conspirator a woman could ask for. You inspire me, make me think about things in new and exciting ways, and the world is just fun when we’re together. To Benny, and Jeff for taking care of my cats, sending me postcards, and being there whenever I need you. To Jez, for your creativity and support with this website, and working through all my problems with patience.

To Katie, for being more than my sister – for being my best friend, my support, my source of strength when I’m feeling down, for worrying and caring. To my parents, for inspiring me to have amazing adventures and encouraging me to seize life with both hands and squeeze the fun out of it. To my whole family, which is pretty much the best family I could ask for. I feel immensely grateful to be lucky enough to be related to you.

To my community in San Francisco and in no particular order – Benny and Jeff, the bus stop house, and chiefly Justin, Jeremy, Molly, Becky, and Kate, Jane, Liz, Eve, Nicole, Penny, Darcy, Laura, Whitney, Dana, Jen, Justine, Shayna, Charley, Katy, Patrick, Elizabeth, Liam, Sakura, Toni, Nicki, Carlina, Makenna, Sandra, Kim, Royce, Emily, Caroline, Jon, Ronnie, Crystal, Jeffy, Beth, Mara, B-love, Izzy, Mikel, Baron, Lisa, Feliz, Nicole, Cindy, Tara, Daphne, Jake, Destiny, Lupe, the fabulous staff at the ACLU, the board members of Alice and ACCESS, and the rest of the people who made up the tapestry of my life in the city. Your support made this trip possible, and y’all made my life a brilliant chaotic mess of fun.

This trip also would not have been possible without all the people who donated money to keep my tummy full, and I am eternally grateful and slightly astounded that so many people gave me their hard earned money so that I could have this adventure. So to Good Vibrations, especially, and  Luke, Dana, Jeannie, Patrick, Natalia, Katy and Charley, Carol and Robert, Connie, Dick, Ronnie, Debbie, Patty, Stella, Justine, Tracy, Lydia, Emily, Ky and the Guse family, Caroline, Jon, Carlina, Beth, Mom and Dad, and my Grammie, thank you for believing in my journey and helping me along the way.

And then, there is the trip itself. I’m not sure if I’m going to be able to do this, but I’m going to give it a try. Apologies in advance to the people I will forget. I’m sure as I’m riding today, I’ll remember more people, so expect edits to this entry.

From the top, then – my utmost gratitude to Lydia and Rebekah, for hosting me in New York City, to Cathy and Don, for being incredible relatives and storing my stuff, buying me rain jackets, and launching me off on wanderlust with love and care. To Elizabeth and everyone at Hi Tops for providing a new and welcome vision of sex education. To Nan and John, for hosting me and challenging my ideas about polyamory and what it means to be happy. To Katie, for the amazing conversation and my own wing. To Stacy, for letting me use your room in New Haven while you were gone, and to Caity for being inspired to bring Femsex to Yale.

To Steve and Jackie, for showing me an idyllic version of Providence, to Vanessa, Anne, and Meghan, for carrying the Femsex banner at Brown. To Karina and Andrew for taking care of me in Boston, to Meghara, for showing me the different sides of Boston via sex ed classes, and to Brian, for putting me in touch with your community throughout New York. To Sarah Cunningham, for connecting me to delightful people in Albany and Syracuse. To Noa, Vanessa, and the rest of the Harvard femsexies, for inviting me in and making me feel like part of your community. To the staff at Good Vibes in Boston for carrying the sex positive torch onward.

To Marion and Hugh Stoddard, for an evening in Groton and teaching me that age really is relative, and that endless, boundless curiousity is truly the fountain of youth. To Andria and Jordan, for hosting me in Amherst, and to Ellen, Azi, and the rest of the staff at CLPP in Hampshire.

To Analisa, Maria, Andy, and everyone else at Casa Tierra Comun, for taking me in and showing me what community can really mean. And especially thanks to Andy for the camelbak, which took me through many scorching days in the high Wyoming desert. Muchisimas gracias a todos ustedes, con todo mi corazon.

To Travis, for stopping me on the way into Albany and making my day by inviting me to craft night, and to Corinne and Billy, for the incredible conversations, ridiculous costumes, naked calendars, and love. To Billy for writing an amazing book, and for inspiring my thoughts in whole new directions. To everyone at the Albany Free School and the Family Life Center for showing me that we can change the way we teach our children.

My deepest thanks to Blue, for sharing with me your vision and thoughts about Planned Parenthood, to the teen health educators there for being amazing activists (even if you don’t see if that way). To the staff at Family Planning Advocates of New York State, for your shared vision and incredible commitment to advocating for policy change in New York. And especially for the hot pink boa.

To the Bread and Roses collective in Syracuse, and Jessica, Lindsay, and Kim, for inviting me into your beautiful home and sharing food, laughter, and fire dancing with me. To Betty and Rachel at Planned Parenthood, for sharing your stories. To Sally Wagner, for educating me about Mattilda Joselyn Gage and making me think about who writes our histories.

To Don and Ari, for sharing your home and showing me the stars. To Natasha and Molly for sharing your vision of sex education. To Greg and Delilah for dinner and community.

Utmost gratitude and thanks also to Mark and Debby Epstein, for launching me down the Delaware with a full tummy, to Joe Naughton for letting me pitch a tent on your lawn, to Vince and Diane, for welcoming me back into the place I was born. To Sheryl, for hosting me in Philadelphia. To Irit and Tara, for teaching me about different ways to view advocacy and the connections between sexuality and spirituality. To everyone at PP of Southeastern Pennsylvania for inspiring me with your education programs, especially sex ed year round. To BEBASHI, for providing perspective on advocacy and access to health care in the African American community. To Jackie at the Choice Hotline, for making me think about how we provide information and who gets access to it.

Thanks to Amy Marlow, for a comfortable bed and delicious biscotti and tea. To Amber and Josh, for welcoming me into your home and community in Baltimore. To Jacque and Laura, for sharing your vision and inviting me to the International Drag King Extravaganza. To Ann, for riding pell mell around the city and the mon-key. To Jodie for sharing your love of Baltimore with me, even if you couldn’t share in person.

To Natalie and Wes in DC, for the cool place to rest my head, and my cousin Sarah for being an awesome cousin and host. Holla! To Bill, at SEICUS, and Ricci and Ann at Woodhull, for helping shape my ideas about sexuality and how it relates to the rest of our culture.

My gratitude to Choice USA, for honoring me with your recognition, and for all the wonderful work you do. To Rebecca for supporting my trip and providing me with contacts around the country. To Gloria, for being, still and indubitably, a fierce and fabulous warrior who inspires me to think about what I want to do in the next fifty years. To Debbie and Ray, for supporting me and welcoming me into your refuge in Virginia. To Roy and Ann, for coming and celebrating with me.

To Emily, for your support of my trip and being a fabulous host in Bloomington, and to Melissa, for the drive to Chicago and the conversation. To Catherine, Jenny, and everyone at the Kinsey Institute for teaching me about the scientific side of sexuality, and to Debby, for sharing with me your research and perspective.

To Dimitra, for opening your home to Elizabeth and me in Chicago, and for connecting us to interesting people throughout the city. To Soo Ji, Jack, Searah, and Carolyn, for sharing your work and your visions of what being sex-positive means (and special thanks to Searah and Early to Bed for the movies…) To the women of Sistersong, for challenging my beliefs and ideas about advocacy, race, and privilege. To Jocelyn Elders, for being just absolutely amazing. To the women of Sistas on the Rise, for teaching me to think differently about teen pregnancy. To Manny, for the couch and the beer…

My gratitude to Karen and Mike, for hosting us in Kenosha and showing us your town, and to Jenny, for connecting us, sight unseen. To Emily, for welcoming us into your brand spanking new house in Milwaukee. To Jacquie, M’lissa, and Rick, for the warm food and warmer welcomes in Madison. To Rick for my super fantastic lightweight soda can stove. To Carmen, Keri, and Erin, for sharing your passion and your efforts to organize in Madison. To Kristen for the ladies lawn party and a place to sleep in Viroqua, and giving me an excuse to wear the pink boa. And for the mint julep fountain.

Thanks also to James and Laurel, for taking me in in Decorah, Iowa, and to Laurel for the care package and the floss. To Nelva and Leroy for the hospitality in Boyden and the stories of childhood.
To Marcia, Phil, and James, for taking me in and making me feel like part of the family. To Ky, especially, for driving me clear across South Dakota and being an amazing ally and friend. To Ellen, for showing me the Native American Women’s Health Resource Center, to Sharon, for your vision and passion in running the center, and to Germaine, for teaching me about the importance of language in culture.

To Kate Looby and everyone at Planned Parenthood, for your commitment and vision in the face of adversity. To Nathan, for your persective on political organizing and priorities. To Jane Murphy, for being a West River organizing goddess and connecting me with interesting people, and for the pasta salad. To Erin and Melanie for the karaoke. To the Murrays for a beautiful place to stay in Rapid City. To the couple who gave me a ride out of the campground and rescued me from a tornado – thank you.

My gratitude to Jo Nugent, for the mint on my pillow and the conversation, and for launching me into the wilds of Wyoming. To the staff at the Aberdeen Area Tribal Health Council for reminding me that everything is connected. To all the people who shared beer and conversations with me at campgrounds down the long solitary road.

To Ben, for keeping me company through Montana and reminding me why I both love and hate 18 year old boys. To Keith, for the raft ride and the bliss of a pillow after two weeks on the road. To Molly, for the most interesting train ride I’ve ever had.

To Kristin, Chris, and everyone at the Meridian house for a lovely place to stay. To Inga, for writing and then giving me the exact book that I needed in my life, and for being a fierce and uncompromising teller of truth. To Kati for the guidance through the city and the DIY bike repairing, and to everyone at the Bean and Bagel for the coffee and the bagels. To Liezl and Anne, for teaching me about the power of networking.

To Momoko, for picking us up in Astoria and magically fitting our bikes in your car, and for putting us up (and putting up with us). To Judith, for telling us your story and teaching me about balance and the need for all kinds of approaches.

Utmost gratitude to Lee, for riding out and blocking the wind for me, and to you and Nancy and Jane for the welcome, the delicious food, the newspapers, and the conversation. To Will and Celeste, Mike and Susan, Heather, Lea, and everyone else in the glorious tribe that’s winding its way down the coast by bicycle.

To Nancy, for being my final, lovely, gracious host, and for the play, the conversation, and the care and feeding.

To Cari, for being a deep and true friend, and for connecting me with places to stay throughout the country. Also for popping up in various cities and making me feel like I was home again.

To all the nameless people across the country who have encouraged me, fed me, made me laugh, and fueled my desire to see more of the country. To the woman I met five years ago on a solo bike tour who encouraged me to get on my bike and go. To the moon, for being constantly on the watch.

This trip has changed my life in countless and innumerable ways, only some of which are visible to me at present. I am truly, deeply, incredibly grateful to each of you, and all of the people named herein, for being part of my journey. If there were more words to say thank you, I would use them…but given the limitations of our language, I will simply say thank you, for being who you are in my life, and for being part of my world.

Y’all rock.

Now, I’m hopping on my bike, for the third to last time. Here’s to community, to friends, and to glorious tailwinds.

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